Adam Goucher noticed that I recently laid a curse upon commercial test tool vendors (with the exception of Hexawise, Blueberry Consultants, and Atlassian). He wondered to me how a tool vendor might avoid my curse.

First, I’m flattered that he would even care who I curse. But, it’s a good question. Here’s my answer:

Test tool vendors that bug me:

  • Any vendor who wants me to pay for every machine I use their tool upon. Guys, the nature of testing is that I need to work with a lot of machines. Sell me the tool for whatever you want to charge, but you are harming my testing by putting obstacles between me and my test lab.
  • Any vendor that sell tools conceived and designed by a goddamn developer who hates to goddamn test. How do I know about the developer of a test tool? Well, when I’m looking at a tool and I find myself asking “Have these vendor bozos ever actually had to test something in their lives? Did they actually want a tool like this to help them? I bet this tool will triple the amount of time and energy I have to put into testing, and make me hate every minute of it” then I begin to suspect there are no great lovers of testing in the house. This was my experience when I worked with Rational Test Manager , in 2001. I met the designer of that tool: a kid barely out of MIT with no testing or test management experience who informed me that I, a Silicon Valley test management veteran, wasn’t qualified to criticize his design.
  • Any vendor selling me the opportunity, at great cost, to simulate a dim-witted test executioner. Most tool vendors don’t understand the difference between testing and checking, and they think what I want is a way to “test while I sleep.” Yes, I do want the ability to extend my power as a tester, but that doesn’t mean I’m happy to continually tweak and maintain a brittle set of checks that have weak oracles and weak coverage.
  • Any vendor who designs tools by guessing what will impress top managers in large companies who know nothing about testing. In other words: tools to support ceremonial software testing. Cem and I once got a breathless briefing about a “risk-based test management” tool from Compuware. Cem left the meeting early, in disgust. I lingered and tried to tell them why their tool was worthless. (Have you ever said that to someone, and they reacted by saying “I know it’s not perfect” and you replied by saying “Yes, it’s not perfect. I said it’s worthless, therefore it would follow that it’s also not perfect. You could not pay me to use this tool. This tool further erodes my faith in the American public education system, and by extension the American experiment itself. I’m saying that you just ruined America with your stupid stupid tool. So yeah, it’s not perfect.”) I think what bugged Cem and me the most is that these guys were happy to get our endorsement, if we wanted to give it, but they were not at all interested in our advice about how the tool could be re-designed into being a genuine risk-based testing tool. Ugh, marketers.
  • Vendors who want to sell me a tool that I can code up in Perl in a day. I don’t see the value of Cucumber. I don’t need FIT (although to his credit, the creator of FIT also doesn’t see the big deal of FIT). But if I did want something like that, it’s no big deal to write a tool in Perl. And both of those tools require that you write code, anyway. They are not tools that take coding out of our hands. So why not DIY?

Tool vendors I like:

  • Vendors who care what working testers think of their tools and make changes to impress them. Blueberry, Hexawise, and Sirius Software have all done that.
  • Vendors who have tools that give me vast new powers. I love the idea of virtual test labs. VMWare, for instance.
  • Vendors who don’t shackle me to restrictive licenses. I love ActivePerl, which I can use all over the place. And I happily pay for things like their development kit.
  • Vendors who enjoy testing. Justin Hunter, of Hexawise, is like that. He’s the only vendor speaking at CAST, this year, you know.